4/08/2010

Bachmann and Palin on Hannity: Like Hell on Earth:
Last night Rep. Michele Bachmann and celebrity Sarah Palin joined Sean Hannity on his Fox "news" program. The occasion was a Minneapolis rally for Bachmann's reelection where Palin spoke. It was not unlike a menage a trois in Hell, where you get so tired of the barbed tails in your ass and mouth that you wonder when you can just go back to roasting in a lake of fire.

Right out of the gate, Hannity said one of those inconceivably idiotic things, something that makes you wonder if he actually listens to his own show. Talking about sexist attacks on Palin and Bachmann (without using the word "sexist," because, on supposes, it's part of the liberal lexicon), he offered, "You have been criticized for your looks, for your clothes, et cetera, et cetera." And then he queried, "What do you think the reaction would be if things that were said about either of you were said about either Hillary Clinton or Michelle Obama or Nancy Pelosi? Would there be a difference?"

And Hannity might be right to ask such a question if he wasn't completely wrong. Because to ask that question in that way is to willfully ignore a King Kong-sized shitpile of sexist criticism of Pelosi, Clinton, and Obama. Where do you wanna go with this? Pelosi facelift remarks? Pelosi facelift remarks made on Hannity's own fucking show? Jokes about Hillary Clinton's looks? Sexist remarks about Hillary Clinton aired without condemnation on Hannity's own fucking show? And, no, we've never had to listen to any attacks on the way Michelle Obama dresses. Oh, except for all those attacks on the way she dresses, including on Hannity's own fucking show.

Bachmann's response to Hannity was to make some off-handed remark about the media, adding, "We all know that there's a double standard." And then Palin said some stupid bitch thing. (That was sarcasm, motherfuckers, sarcasm. Unless it wasn't. Who knows?)

The whole of the interview was like watching three wildebeests fuck each other - awkward, stupid-looking, and mostly goddamned funny. Of course, to the wildebeests, it's very serious business, this fucking they're engaged in. Palin did what she always does; she strung together key words and talking points into nonsense verse: "I think this is indicative of what is coming in November. I think that there will be that sweeping of change and you will see that takeover, if you will, a positive, a good valuable takeover of common sense conservatives back in Congress." That's not actually a sentence with a logical progression of ideas. But it does contain words that the slavering teabaggers in the room could understand. It's the conservative version of pointing and grunting.

Bachmann, of course, continued with her apocalyptic fear-mongering: "Well, we're looking at certain bankruptcy and certain economic collapse if we don't get our house in order. Within 10 years leading economists tell us the United States will essentially be in the same position as Greece. The United States of America."

And then Palin followed up the fearmongering by saying it's not fearmongering, "Now and let me remind you, Sean, too, when we talk like this, when we talk like this, you know that lame stream media, they will get weed out about this. Their heads will spin and they will tell people that we are fear mongers, that we are exaggerating the State of the Union. And yet this is reality." Or, in other words, "Grunt. Lame stream media. Grunt."

They went on to talk about Obama's nuclear arms policy, and asking Sarah Palin about nuke policy is like asking an especially inarticulate five year-old if she prefers early or later Bergman films. They all praised Ronald Reagan, without acknowledging that, like Obama, he negotiated disarmament deals. And by the time Bachmann said, "I want to thank Governor Palin for breaking the barrier by being a woman as a vice president on the ticket," as if the barrier hadn't been broken 30 years earlier by Geraldine Ferraro, the Rude Pundit couldn't get his head around the number of delusions, lies, and distortions.

The fact that these two people are considered "leaders" in their movement demonstrates that the movement itself is an empty vessel, lurching forward, hoping to accomplish nothing more, and nothing less, than just wrecking whatever is in its path.