5/23/2012

A President Romney's Policies Would Make Him and His Son Even Richer:
Let us return to a minor manufactured controversy from the huge factory of Made-Up Shit What Right Wingers Need to Believe About President Obama. Back in August 2011, the President's uncle - his estranged father's half-brother, to be more precise - was arrested for drunk driving in Massachusetts. An illegal immigrant, he was held by Immigrations and Customs Enforcement but was later released, pending a hearing on his deportation.

This was completely legal, yet absolutely outrageous, according to some Republicans. Representative Lamar Smith of Texas blamed changes in immigration policy under Obama and spittled that the President's "illegal immigrant uncle might be one of the first illegal immigrants to benefit from it. President Obama’s uncle is a test case for why this new policy is a threat to the American people."

Was Onyango Obama treated differently because of his relationship to the president? No doubt. Did changes in immigration law help him? Possibly. But not much. He still faces that deportation hearing, which could take years because he applied for amnesty. And he did get his driver's license back because, well, that's the law in Massachusetts and the deal that the man cut with prosecutors.

But this isn't really about immigration or Uncle Onyango. No, what this is really about is presidential candidate Mitt Romney and at least one of his sons, Taggart, who goes by "Tagg" because otherwise it's proof that his parents were too fucking stupid not to give him a name that rhymes with "fart."

See, Tagg Romney is a founding partner in Solamere Capital, described in Businessweek as "a private equity and venture capital firm specializing in buyout, turnaround, growth equity, distressed, credit, and venture capital investments." It was started with $10 million dollars from Mitt Romney. It now has a $250 million private equity fund whose holdings the Rude Pundit could not find. More than likely, it involves doing the same shit that dear old dad did at Bain.

Should hell freeze over, pigs fly, and Mitt Romney becomes president, the very policies that he is campaigning on, the very policies that he has said he would enact, would enrich the coffers of private equity firms. Like Solamere Capital. And the pockets of its partners, like Tagg Romney. Repealing even the weak sauce that is Dodd-Frank, as Romney promises to do, makes donors from private equity open their wallets like the pussy lips of the sultan's best-kept concubine.

Why is this not an issue? Are we immune now to such outright corruption in our post-Bush/Cheney oil orgy? Do we simply expect our politicians to make themselves and their friends richer and merely hope that there's some collateral benefit for the rest of us poor fuckers who don't have access to the pot of gold?

By the way, as long as the Obama administration is hitting Romney on Bain Capital for deals that are, yes, quite legal, and, yes, quite immoral, they should be hitting him hard on the fact that Romney still makes money from the investing that Bain does. Yeah, his retirement deal included a percentage of future profits from his firm. When Bain guts a company now, a bell rings and Mitt Romney buys another car elevator.

So Mitt Romney has a direct financial stake in the slippery rules that govern the slimy world of investment capital. And, as president, he would make sure that the viscous slug trail of cash kept flowing to his friends, his family, and himself.

Who on the right would call out that nepotistic act?